*I have taken the door off the van*



I had no choice right from when I first passed my test, that was my only means of transport and I quiet honestly, scared myself shitless, often just closing my eyes and squeezing through gaps!

Over the years we could have dined out on my driving stories lol.

So, Im sorry girls I have most definitely let the team down in this department.

I have reversed over someones car dragging them backwards up the street TWICE, the first one ,he was lovely about it – his girlfriend, she was none too pleased though as he was driving her dads car, taking her on a date

and the second one…… well he went into shock, he stopped talking, we made him a sweet cup of tea and eventually he came back to us!


I have reversed into a British rail post in the market carpark and took the whole fence with me – much to all the traders amusement !

I have reversed over a 6ft 6″traders foot in flip-flops – he had a blue and green foot for months!

  ( he didn’t wear nail polish though lol !)

The traders found my driving hilarious, it never bothered me and the bigger the van the more I enjoyed driving it.

It was just reversing I struggled with. Ive hit our house with the van 3 times wiped out the front wall twice and Ive taken the corner off the garage roof !

Basically, don’t get behind me when Im in a van.


This story always makes me giggle going back to when we were 19, we gradually door knocked the Medway towns trying to get people to have a clothes rail delivered.

Stupidly, believing the bigger the house, the more money they would spend but  they tended to have huge mortgages, so no spare money for shopping or they didn’t want their friends to know they were buying  this ex-catalogue stock, so they would have the rail delivered, just for themselves to look through.

Obviously this was just not cost effective, maybe it would have worked if we were selling highend expensive garments but we need to sell volume, we couldn’t choose our sizes, so we had to pray we had at least a few garments on the rail that fitted everyone.

Sometimes we would turn up with the rail and I knew as I set up I was about to get abuse as to why we had nothing to fit normal ladies with busts bellies and bums!

It was just so frustrating.

We found the best parties were always on the council estates, they always rebooked and had a houseful.

Now that we had better stock, we needed to be getting more parties booked to get the rails out constantly, which meant, door knocking and canvasing continually.

One night Matt had football training so me and my friend Jackie went out door knocking.

We parked up with plenty of room behind and in front but on returning, I was blocked in. I started to reverse the van but couldn’t see so, Jackie got out to direct me from behind, she left the door open and I was reversing really slowly watching the front right side as Jackie waved me back.

I started to hear a strange noise and then realised the door Jackie had left open was bending around a tree as I was reversing !!!!!!

We couldn’t bend it back in fact it was hanging off!

I knocked a random door and this man came out and ended up hitting it with a hammer until it came off!!!!

We drove home, with the door in the back of the van, Jackie hanging on for dear life around every corner.

I went straight to Geralds (Matts football manager) who’s van it was and burst into tears explaining I had bent the door around a tree!

God knows how he taped the door back on so I could drive home and lock it but basically this was the last straw for our Wilma Flintstone van.

She needed to retire.

We had broken down so many times that the AA wouldn’t renew our policy, we had to join the RAC.

I remember once, us having to stop start all the way to Peterborough as we were over heating but praying, we could make it to pick up some stock, then being actually relieved at breaking down on the way home because if the tow truck brought us back, it saved us buying the petrol lol.

We had to get another van, this one was an equally rusty LT VW van.

Matt brought a large tin of Hammerite paint and painted it bright blue with a broom no less.

So the paint job was far from catching but when this one broke down, it had the added bonus of the engine being in the front of the van ,so you could open it up and put your feet in the engine compartment to keep them warm.

Which we’ve done when it was freezing and no one could pick us up as it was a bank holiday weekend!

The van was sat idle in the day time as 99% of the clothes parties were in the evening.

It was pointless door knocking in the day as most girls were out at work.

How could we earn more money?

Well, at least enough to keep a van on the road!

How about if we could deliver stock to all the ladies in their work place? 


This weeks fav

I love this soft Pink roll neck jumper its £6.99 size 8-20

Its not itchy and lifts black,grey& navy👍

Have a great week girls

Leave me your comments below.

xxxx  J a n e  H u m e xxx











3 thoughts on “*I have taken the door off the van*”

  1. Flipping ek Jane and I’ve let u drive me to Sheerness over that bridge 😂🤣!! Ignorance is bliss so they say & I survived, so no harm done ! 😁 xxx

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