Valentines Tongue In The Ear!

So its that red❤️time of the year again February 14th

Who else can remember desperately wanting a card from a real boy and not their dad or mum?

At Primary school we had a postbox that we would post our cards in and then they were handed out on the 14th by the prefects.

I can still remember that defeated, fugly feeling as you sat there with zero cards whilst your mate received like 50!

As you got older it was all about the sheer size of card not the quantity.

The bigger the better for proving his devotion and the Créme de la Créme, the Piéce de Résistance was the either the foil card or the giant padded card that came in a box no less!

In the same way that the wallpaper you covered your books in signified how posh your house was, the giant padded card signified how serious your boyfriend was.

Thankfully with age comes the realisation that giant cards, presents and expensive gifts, nice as they might be, mean jack shit – if you can’t stand the site of one another.

Ask yourself not could you just be with that person if they had nothing but their smile but more importantly, would you still want to be with just that person and their smile?????

We all know what it feels like to have the ‘ick’

My definition of the ‘ick’ is no matter how nice they try to be you just can’t get out their space quick enough.

You feel really cruel but you struggle to control your gag reflexes, everything they say, do, wear, including breathing aggs the life out you lol in fact, the nicer they are the more you hate them!

How nasty can love be???

I remember my friend Naomi, going out with this boy Andrew and him bringing his best friend to the fairground, like a double date.

Holy moly, looking back I must of done absolutely nothing for this poor boys confidence!

Poor sod kept trying to hold my hand, he must of thought I was severely dyspraxic.

I must of retied my shoe laces, on my trainers, at least thirty times so it gave me a reason to let go of his sweaty hand.

We went on the ghost train, worst mistake ever!

Either one of the monsters or himself somehow managed to get a tongue in my ear…….. I think it was as I tried to stop it going in my mouth!

I felt like I had been put through the washing machine on a fast wash by the time I came out the other side of the ride!

And I actually could have won an Osca for how I got myself out of the kiss goodbye, its called the help there’s a wasp and Im allergic manic arm flapping, frenzied sprint.

Basically you run in every direction – except the one where he is leaning in for the snog.

He just wouldn’t get the hint though and shouted ,

“See you, Monday I will knock to walk to school with you”

It gets worse, the poor boy wrote me a mushy poem for Valentines which, nasty 12 year old me thought should be shared out in the cloakroom for laughs along with the chocolates and flowers.

And there is a perfect example of just how nasty love can be.

Now, I would be lying if I didn’t fantasise about burying Matt under the patio most days in fact several times a day!

Especially as we work together but this will be our 37th Valentines day and I can thankfully say I still love his smile and company more than any of the gifts money could buy.

Lucky for him lol as he has not one ounce of romance running through his veins!

I should have known this from when I carted my first giant card to school to open it in front of all my friends.

He had just signed it ME2 Crew – his breakdance tag name. ?

There was no mushy lovey dovey stuff going on, no….

ROSES ARE RED,

VIOLETS ARE BLUE,

just ME2Crew!!!!!

Matts Oh so romantic signature NOT!

I climbed up in the loft and found just a few of the Valentines cards from over the years.

I have actually kept them all, along with every Birthday and Christmas card!

I hope you all have a great Valentines day girls and that you find, your perfect princes, with not too many,’ick’s and tongue slip ups along the way.????

THIS WEEKS FAV

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